funniest thing you've ever seen here

[Rig]

http://forums.wotmud.info/viewtopic.php?f=74&t=9655

I no longer pk. I smob to ta'veren 1

[granit]

we'll see..

[Rig]

* R S HP:Wounded DP:Strong MV:Full >
The gleeman screams 'Eeek, a trolloc! Get me out of here!!!'
THE GLEEMAN PANICS AND ATTEMPTS TO FLEE!
The mysterious lady's hands begin weaving crystals of water and air...
NOGNAHOJ PANICS AND ATTEMPTS TO FLEE!
The mysterious lady unleashes a flurry of icy spikes at Nognahoj, who is stabbed repeatedly.
Anthrax tries to slash the mysterious lady, but she deflects the blow.
The mysterious lady's hands begin weaving crystals of water and air...
The mysterious lady unleashes a flurry of icy spikes at Nognahoj, who is stabbed repeatedly.
The gleeman tries to pierce you, but you deflect the blow.
The mysterious lady's hands begin weaving crystals of water and air...
The mysterious lady unleashes a flurry of icy spikes at Nognahoj, who is stabbed repeatedly.
A Tar Valon bridgeguard tries to slash Nognahoj, but he dodges the attack.
The mysterious lady hits Nognahoj's right arm extremely hard.
Nognahoj is dead! R.I.P.
Your blood freezes as you hear Nognahoj's death cry.
A flaming slick of hot oil pours down from above!
The hot oil poured from above burns Anthrax's flesh!
The hot oil burns your flesh!

BALANCE

[rodurnon]

On my old kobal watching khunark fade and he jumps into the pit with a full set.

[Rentris]

So Avail and I were exploring the Volcano because we had heard that there was a new smob. We wanted to scout it out and see what it was all about. We had absolutely no prior information than it was in there somewhere. This was before it was downed.

open waterfall
* HP:Healthy MV:Haggard > Ok.

* HP:Healthy MV:Weary >
Avail says 'ooo'

* HP:Healthy MV:Weary >
Avail leaves west.

* HP:Healthy MV:Weary > beckon
You beckon everyone to follow you.

* HP:Healthy MV:Weary > scan w

* HP:Healthy MV:Weary > open waterfall
w
It's already open!

* HP:Healthy MV:Weary > Behind the Waterfall
[ obvious exits: ]

* HP:Healthy MV:Weary >
You slip and fall on the rocks behind the waterfall.
A fast, wet plummet into darkness is your fate!
Ouch!

HP:Scratched MV:Weary > look
Preparing to find this room on the map.
All you can do right now is think about the stars!

HP:Scratched MV:Weary > wake
All you can do right now is think about the stars!

HP:Scratched MV:Weary >
You regain consciousness.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary >
Avail leaves north.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > lo
At the Underground Stream
High above is a straight chute of slick rock, worn to glasslike smoothness
over time by a waterfall. Even now the water pours down and forms shallow
pools that seep into the ground. The air is humid and, oddly, warm, almost
hot. There is a smell of sulfur tinging the smell of the water.
[ obvious exits: N ]

No matching room name found! Update your map.

A mushroom grows here.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary >
Avail has arrived from the north.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary >
Avail leaves north.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > con guard
Well, he is taller than you, heavier than you, and in general stockier than you.
Now where did that chicken go?

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > lo guard
All brawny muscle, this guard looks as if he could be carved from stone,
until he moves. A seasoned fighter, he knows how to separate your head from
the rest of your body.

A determined guard has a few scratches.

a determined guard is using:
<worn on head> a metal helmet
<worn on body> a thick mail shirt
<worn on arms> a set of thin metal vambraces
<worn on hands> a pair of metal half-gauntlets
<worn as shield> a large spiked shield
<wielded> a rapier
<worn on legs> a pair of thin metal leggings
<worn on feet> a pair of thin metal boots

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary >
A determined guard leaves north.
A determined guard leaves north.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary >
Adonis narrates 'My stallion is tired'

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > tell avail i regret this decision
You tell Avail 'i regret this decision'

look
Preparing to find this room on the map.
* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > At the Underground Stream
High above is a straight chute of slick rock, worn to glasslike smoothness
over time by a waterfall. Even now the water pours down and forms shallow
pools that seep into the ground. The air is humid and, oddly, warm, almost
hot. There is a smell of sulfur tinging the smell of the water.
[ obvious exits: N ]

No matching room name found! Update your map.

A mushroom grows here.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary >
Avail has arrived from the north.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary >
Avail tells you 'lmao'

fol avail
* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > You now follow Avail.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > say at least these guys aren't aggro
You say 'at least these guys aren't aggro'

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary >
A determined guard has arrived from the north.
A determined guard has arrived from the north.
A determined guard has arrived from the north.
A determined guard has arrived from the north.
A determined guard has arrived from the north.
A determined guard has arrived from the north.
A determined guard has arrived from the north.
A determined guard has arrived from the north.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary >

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > say OH MY firetrucking GOD!
A determined guard barely pounds Avail's left arm.
A determined guard pounds Avail's body.
A determined guard tickles Avail's body with his pound.
A determined guard pounds Avail's left leg.
A determined guard pounds Avail's left leg.
A determined guard tries to pierce Avail, but he parries successfully.
A determined guard pounds Avail's head.
A determined guard tickles Avail's left foot with his pierce.
Avail kicks a determined guard in solar plexus, a determined guard is rendered breathless!
You say 'OH MY firetrucking GOD!'

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > k guard

A determined guard barely tickles Avail's body with his pierce.
A determined guard tickles Avail's left foot with his pierce.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary > Wimpy reset to: 209 hit points.
You try to slash a determined guard, but he deflects the blow.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary - Avail: Beaten - a determined guard: Healthy >
You try to slash a determined guard, but he deflects the blow.
A determined guard barely pierces Avail's left arm.
A determined guard tries to pound Avail, but he deflects the blow.
A determined guard pounds Avail's left leg hard.
A determined guard pounds Avail's left arm.
A determined guard pounds Avail's left arm.
A determined guard pounds Avail's left arm.
A determined guard tickles Avail's body with his pound.
A determined guard tickles Avail's left foot with his pierce.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary - Avail: Beaten - a determined guard: Healthy > vv
[ch mood brave]
Mood changed to: Brave
Wimpy reset to: 125 hit points.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary - Avail: Beaten - a determined guard: Healthy >
Avail panics, and attempts to flee!

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary - Avail: Beaten - a determined guard: Healthy >
You try to slash a determined guard, but he deflects the blow.
A determined guard tries to pierce Avail, but he deflects the blow.
A determined guard tries to pound Avail, but he deflects the blow.
A determined guard barely pounds Avail's left leg.
A determined guard tries to pound Avail, but he parries successfully.
A determined guard pounds Avail's body.
A determined guard tries to pound Avail, but he deflects the blow.
A determined guard barely pounds Avail's body.
A determined guard barely tickles Avail's left arm with his pierce.
A determined guard tries to pierce Avail, but he parries successfully.
A determined guard tries to pierce Avail, but he parries successfully.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary - Avail: Critical - a determined guard: Healthy > sheath
draw spear
You sheath a gold-chased war spear into a leather baldric.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary - Avail: Critical - a determined guard: Healthy > You skillfully wield a gold-chased war spear from a leather baldric.
You wield a gold-chased war spear with both hands.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary - Avail: Critical - a determined guard: Healthy >
Avail leaves north.

* HP:Scratched MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched >
A determined guard barely pounds your left foot.
A determined guard pounds your right foot.
A determined guard pounds your body.
A determined guard tries to pound you, but you deflect the blow.
A determined guard barely pounds your head.
A determined guard tickles your body with his pound.
A determined guard tickles your right foot with his pierce.
A determined guard tickles your body with his pierce.
You barely slash a determined guard's body.

lo
* HP:Hurt MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched > A determined guard tickles your left leg with his pierce.
A determined guard tickles your body with his pierce.
At the Underground Stream
High above is a straight chute of slick rock, worn to glasslike smoothness
over time by a waterfall. Even now the water pours down and forms shallow
pools that seep into the ground. The air is humid and, oddly, warm, almost
hot. There is a smell of sulfur tinging the smell of the water.
[ obvious exits: N ]
A mushroom grows here.
A determined guard is here, fighting YOU!
A determined guard is here, fighting YOU!
A determined guard is here, fighting YOU!
A determined guard is here, fighting YOU!
A determined guard is here, fighting YOU!
A determined guard is here, fighting YOU!
A determined guard is here, fighting YOU!
A determined guard is here, fighting YOU!

* HP:Hurt MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched > v
[ch mood wimpy]
Mood changed to: Wimpy
Wimpy reset to: 209 hit points.

f
You panic and attempt to flee!ned guard: Scratched >


You flee head over heels.
Where Two Streams Converge
[ obvious exits: N S ]
Lord Avail Sa'Ran the Dai Shan is standing here.

* HP:Hurt MV:Weary > n
The celldoor seems to be closed.

* HP:Hurt MV:Weary >
A determined guard has arrived from the south.
A determined guard has arrived from the south.
A determined guard has arrived from the south.
A determined guard has arrived from the south.
A determined guard has arrived from the south.
A determined guard has arrived from the south.
A determined guard has arrived from the south.
A determined guard has arrived from the south.

* HP:Hurt MV:Weary > open celldoor
A determined guard tickles your head with his pierce.
A determined guard barely pounds your left leg.
A determined guard pounds your body.
A determined guard tickles your right arm with his pound.
A determined guard tries to pound you, but you parry successfully.
A determined guard barely pounds your body.
A determined guard pounds your body.
A determined guard barely pounds your body.
A determined guard pounds your body.
You try to slash a determined guard, but he parries successfully.
A determined guard tickles your body with his pierce.
A determined guard pounds Avail's right leg.
A determined guard tries to pound Avail, but he deflects the blow.
A determined guard barely pierces Avail's right arm.
Avail says 'unlock celldoor'
It seems to be locked.

* HP:Hurt MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched >
Avail tries to pierce a determined guard, but he parries successfully.
A determined guard tickles your body with his pierce.

* HP:Hurt MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched >
Avail panics, and attempts to flee!

* HP:Hurt MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched > pick celldoor
No way! You're fighting for your life!

* HP:Hurt MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched >
A determined guard barely pounds your body.
A determined guard pounds your body.
A determined guard barely pounds your body.
A determined guard pounds your left leg.
You slash a determined guard's body hard.
A determined guard barely pierces your left arm.
A determined guard tickles Avail's body with his pound.
A determined guard tickles Avail's body with his pound.
A determined guard tries to pierce Avail, but he deflects the blow.

f
n HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched >
Avail leaves south.
You panic and attempt to flee!


You flee head over heels.
At the Underground Stream
[ obvious exits: N ]
A mushroom grows here.
Lord Avail Sa'Ran the Dai Shan is standing here.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > Where Two Streams Converge
[ obvious exits: N S ]
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary >
Neal narrates 'the rest all get north?'

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary >
A determined guard leaves south.
A determined guard leaves south.
A determined guard leaves south.
A determined guard leaves south.
A determined guard leaves south.
A determined guard leaves south.
A determined guard leaves south.
A determined guard leaves south.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > pick celldoor
pick celldoor
You failed to pick the lock.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > pick celldoor
You seem to be unable to pick this lock.

pick celldoor
* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > pick celldoor
You failed to pick the lock.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > pick celldoor
You seem to be unable to pick this lock.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > pick celldoor
You failed to pick the lock.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > You seem to be unable to pick this lock.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > You seem to be unable to pick this lock.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > You failed to pick the lock.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > yell unable to pick
You bellow 'unable to pick'

lo
* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > Where Two Streams Converge
A small stream of water flows from the south into this cavern, where it
violently clashes with an underground river of molten fire. As these two
opposites come together they cancel each other out with a roar and a hiss,
dissipating into the air as if they never existed apart.
[ obvious exits: N S ]

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary >
Weir narrates 'raz still blands'

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary >
Your blood freezes as you hear someone's death cry.
You stop following Avail.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary >
Weir narrates 'equitant too'

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > i
You are carrying:
a water skin
twenty gold crowns
a crystal lightstick
a cup of thick syrup
a ring of silver
a wealth of copper pennies (62)
[5] a stable ticket
[5] a lantern

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > put all pack
You put a water skin in a belt pack.
You put twenty crowns in a belt pack.
You put a crystal lightstick in a belt pack.
You put a cup of thick syrup in a belt pack.
You put a ring of silver in a belt pack.
You put 62 coppers in a belt pack.
You put a stable ticket in a belt pack.
You put a stable ticket in a belt pack.
You put a stable ticket in a belt pack.
You put a stable ticket in a belt pack.
You put a stable ticket in a belt pack.
You put a lantern in a belt pack.
You put a lantern in a belt pack.
You put a lantern in a belt pack.
You put a lantern in a belt pack.
You put a lantern in a belt pack.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > s
get all corpse
n
At the Underground Stream
[ obvious exits: N ]
The corpse of Avail is lying here.
A mushroom grows here.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > You get a water skin from the corpse of Avail.
You get a choice steak from the corpse of Avail.
You get a pair of lissome leather boots with metal capped toes from the corpse of Avail.
You get a set of darkly dyed leather leggings from the corpse of Avail.
You get a soft leather pouch from the corpse of Avail.
You get a silver-worked weapons belt from the corpse of Avail.
You get an emerald-hilted foil from the corpse of Avail.
You get a silver etched shield from the corpse of Avail.
You get a silver Kandori wristcuff from the corpse of Avail.
You get an ivy bracelet from the corpse of Avail.
You get a sturdy pair of full leather gauntlets from the corpse of Avail.
You get a pair of dyed leather armsleeves from the corpse of Avail.
You get a crimson cloak of fine Two Rivers wool from the corpse of Avail.
You get a tunic of finely-crafted chain from the corpse of Avail.
You get a necklace of dark ivy from the corpse of Avail.
You get a necklace of dark ivy from the corpse of Avail.
You get a thick helmet of supple leather from the corpse of Avail.
You get an emerald ring from the corpse of Avail.
You get an emerald ring from the corpse of Avail.
You get an oilstone from the corpse of Avail.
You get a lantern from the corpse of Avail.
You get a lantern from the corpse of Avail.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > Where Two Streams Converge
[ obvious exits: N S ]

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary > i
You are carrying:
[2] a lantern
an oilstone
[2] an emerald ring
a thick helmet of supple leather
[2] a necklace of dark ivy
a tunic of finely-crafted chain
a crimson cloak of fine Two Rivers wool
a pair of dyed leather armsleeves
a sturdy pair of full leather gauntlets
an ivy bracelet
a silver Kandori wristcuff
a silver etched shield
an emerald-hilted foil
a silver-worked weapons belt
a soft leather pouch
a set of darkly dyed leather leggings
a pair of lissome leather boots with metal capped toes
a choice steak
a water skin

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary >
A determined guard has arrived from the south.
A determined guard barely tickles your left arm with his pierce.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Healthy >
Shekure narrates 'trolloc fnw, 2 fades nw by ring'

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Healthy >
You try to slash a determined guard, but he parries successfully.
A determined guard tickles your left foot with his pierce.

drop all
* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Healthy > You drop a lantern.
You drop a lantern.
You drop an oilstone.
You drop an emerald ring.
You drop an emerald ring.
You drop a thick helmet of supple leather.
You drop a necklace of dark ivy.
You drop a necklace of dark ivy.
You drop a tunic of finely-crafted chain.
You drop a crimson cloak of fine Two Rivers wool.
You drop a pair of dyed leather armsleeves.
You drop a sturdy pair of full leather gauntlets.
You drop an ivy bracelet.
You drop a silver Kandori wristcuff.
You drop a silver etched shield.
You drop an emerald-hilted foil.
You drop a silver-worked weapons belt.
You drop a soft leather pouch.
You drop a set of darkly dyed leather leggings.
You drop a pair of lissome leather boots with metal capped toes.
You drop a choice steak.
You drop a water skin.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Healthy >
A determined guard tries to pierce you, but you deflect the blow.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Healthy >
You slash a determined guard's left arm into bloody fragments!
A determined guard tries to pierce you, but you deflect the blow.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched > tell avail god firetrucking dammit
You tell Avail 'god firetrucking dammit'

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched >
A determined guard tries to pierce you, but you deflect the blow.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched >
You try to slash a determined guard, but he deflects the blow.
A determined guard barely tickles your left hand with his pierce.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched > c
[bash ]

-
A determined guard tickles your body with his pierce.

+
A determined guard tickles your right foot with his pierce.

*
As a determined guard avoids your bash, you topple over and fall to the ground!

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched >
A determined guard barely tickles your body with his pierce.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Scratched >
You slash a determined guard's body hard.
A determined guard tickles your body with his pierce.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Hurt > [ch mood brave]
Mood changed to: Brave
Wimpy reset to: 125 hit points.

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Hurt > con guard
Well, he is taller than you, heavier than you, and in general stockier than you.
Now where did that chicken go?

* HP:Wounded MV:Weary - a determined guard: Hurt > c
[bash ]
-----------==============-----------

* HP:Beaten MV:Winded - a determined guard: Beaten > rem all

A determined guard barely pounds your right leg.
PANIC! You couldn't escape!
A determined guard barely pounds your right leg.
You panic and attempt to flee!
A determined guard barely pounds your right arm.
A determined guard pierces your left leg.

n
You flee head over heels.
At the Underground Stream
[ obvious exits: N ]
The corpse of Avail is lying here.
A mushroom grows here.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
A guard stands here, determined you will not pass.
You stop using a crystal lightstick.
You stop using an oilstone.
You stop using an emerald ring.
You stop using an emerald ring.
You stop using a strange, insectoid helm.
You stop using a shimmering pendant of obsidian.
You stop using a Kandori snowflake necklace.
You stop using a tunic of finely-crafted chain.
You stop using a fine black coat of silk.
You stop using a leather baldric.
You stop using a pair of polished, gold-plated vambraces.
You stop using a sturdy pair of full leather gauntlets.
You stop using a silver Kandori wristcuff.
You stop using a silver Kandori wristcuff.
You stop using a gold-chased war spear.
You stop using a belt pack.
You stop using a brightly-colored sash.
You stop using a pair of thick, gold-plated greaves.
You stop using a pair of animal-fur boots.

drop all
o HP:Beaten MV:Winded > It is pitch black...

o HP:Beaten MV:Winded > You drop a pair of animal-fur boots.
You drop a pair of thick, gold-plated greaves.
You drop a brightly-colored sash.
You drop a belt pack.
You drop a gold-chased war spear.
You drop a silver Kandori wristcuff.
You drop a silver Kandori wristcuff.
You drop a sturdy pair of full leather gauntlets.
You drop a pair of polished, gold-plated vambraces.
You drop a leather baldric.
You drop a fine black coat of silk.
You drop a tunic of finely-crafted chain.
You drop a Kandori snowflake necklace.
You drop a shimmering pendant of obsidian.
You drop a strange, insectoid helm.
You drop an emerald ring.
You drop an emerald ring.
You drop an oilstone.
You drop a crystal lightstick.

>
Someone pierces your right leg.
PANIC! You couldn't escape!
Someone pounds your body very hard.
You wish that your wounds would stop BLEEDING so much!

PANIC! You couldn't escape!
Someone pounds your body into bloody fragments!
You wish that your wounds would stop BLEEDING so much!

PANIC! You couldn't escape!
Someone pounds your head.
You wish that your wounds would stop BLEEDING so much!

PANIC! You couldn't escape!
Someone pounds your left foot hard.
You wish that your wounds would stop BLEEDING so much!

You panic and attempt to flee!
Someone pounds your body.
You wish that your wounds would stop BLEEDING so much!

Someone pounds your body.
You wish that your wounds would stop BLEEDING so much!

Someone barely pierces your left arm.
You are incapacitated and will slowly die, if not aided.
You are incapacitated and will slowly die, if not aided.


You're in no shape to flee!

HP:Critical MV:Winded >
You are dead! Sorry...
Ouch! You lose a level.
Circle of Light
[ obvious exits: N D ]
A simple staff, well made for combat, lies here. [2]
A wooden practice shield has been dropped here.
The waters of a blue-veined marble fountain pour forth here.
A stout wooden barrel stands nearby.
Lord Avail the Dai Shan is resting here.
Gale the Journey Accepted is sitting here.
Lord Tolveor the Captain of the Wall is resting here.
A kind-faced figure stands here.
Avail tells you 'u didnt rip?'


And then I logged on a MC to port on our stuff...and the rooms are no-loc.

So i get a gate code for the outside and decide to try to open a gate from inside (never played channie before)
Insta rip like three times.

An immortal took pity on our stupidity and teleported all of our kits to Eagle Manor
Worst dung ever.

[hyzael]

pretty funny