funniest thing you've ever seen here
Re: funniest thing you've ever seen here
im gonna be honest, I haven't seen any real hilarious ones. the one about melayna misporting was pretty funny and there's a few here and there but, I know there are better ones out there hahah.
Re: funniest thing you've ever seen here
I might have the log I’ll check when I get home.
Re: funniest thing you've ever seen here
* R HP:Wounded MV:Strong > Malkier Gate
[ obvious exits: N E W ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
A weapon rack stands on the ground here, ready to store weapons.
|1|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently, being ridden by you.
Petra of Illian is standing here.
Agatha of Illian is resting here, riding a |2|.gray palfrey.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Strong > You are carrying:
a backpack
a pair of ebony-steel plate greaves
* R HP:Wounded MV:Strong > It is a backpack.
When you look inside, you see:
backpack (carried) :
a leather water flask
a tinful of a black, foul liquid
a pair of thick metal boots
a studded leather belt with a crossed swords buckle
a gargantuan gilded bastard sword
[2] a gator skin bracer
a pair of heavy metal gauntlets
a pair of steel-plated vambraces
[2] a torc of gleaming steel
a full metal helmet and visor
[2] a ring of silver
an oilstone
a pair of light, well-oiled leather boots
a divided riding skirt
a silver Kandori wristcuff
a stable ticket
a strange fruit
* R HP:Wounded MV:Strong >
The Shienaran gatekeeper closes the Malkiergate.
The Shienaran gatekeeper locks the Malkiergate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac narrates 'zone w dusty'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > TICK IN 5 SECONDS.
Agatha stops resting, and clambers on her feet.
Ahakwah chats 'anyone know where I can get a studded leather jerkin?'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Agatha closes a weapon rack.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Agatha sits down and rests.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are already standing.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Road Inside the City Walls
[ obvious exits: E W ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
|1|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently, being ridden by you.
A run-down looking man wanders aimlessly, collecting lost belongings.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
A poor trash collector leaves east.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You tell Lyren 'skirt and oiled boots in this pack e u twoer trap'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Ok.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop riding him.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > An Archer's Tower Above the Malkier Gate
[ obvious exits: D ]
An archer draws his bow with a steady hand and a sharp eye.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You hide a backpack.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are carrying:
a pair of ebony-steel plate greaves
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren has arrived from below.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You hide a pair of ebony-steel plate greaves.
- >
You found a backpack.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You give a backpack to Lyren.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > Road Inside the City Walls
[ obvious exits: E W U ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
|1|.Eyes keen, a Domani razor stands here swishing its tail.
|2|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You start riding him.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop riding him.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You start riding him.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Malkier Gate
[ obvious exits: N E W ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
A weapon rack stands on the ground here, ready to store weapons.
|1|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently, being ridden by you.
Petra of Illian is standing here.
Agatha of Illian is resting here, riding a |2|.gray palfrey.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are carrying:
Nothing.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are using:
<used as light> a crystal lightstick
<worn on finger> a gold ring delicately carved with ivy
<worn on finger> a gold ring delicately carved with ivy
<worn on head> a strange, insectoid helm
<worn around neck> a blood-red tattoo of a flying eagle
<worn around neck> a blood-red tattoo of a flying eagle
<worn on body> a tunic of finely-crafted chain
<worn about body> an earthen brown mantle
<slung on back> an embroidered, cotton shoulder bag
<worn on arms> a pair of riveted chainmail sleeves
<worn on hands> a sturdy pair of full leather gauntlets
<worn around wrist> a silver Kandori wristcuff
<worn around wrist> a silver Kandori wristcuff
<wielded two-handed> a jagged edged warsword
<worn on legs> a set of riveted chainmail leggings
<worn on feet> a pair of lissome leather boots with metal capped toes
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop using a crystal lightstick.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You put a crystal lightstick in an embroidered, cotton shoulder bag.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac narrates 'firetruck it i need to go'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Vilac narrates 'going to the yankees game'
You tell Lyren 'will swap ya egown for surcoat if you want'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are using:
<worn on finger> a gold ring delicately carved with ivy
<worn on finger> a gold ring delicately carved with ivy
<worn on head> a strange, insectoid helm
<worn around neck> a blood-red tattoo of a flying eagle
<worn around neck> a blood-red tattoo of a flying eagle
<worn on body> a tunic of finely-crafted chain
<worn about body> an earthen brown mantle
<slung on back> an embroidered, cotton shoulder bag
<worn on arms> a pair of riveted chainmail sleeves
<worn on hands> a sturdy pair of full leather gauntlets
<worn around wrist> a silver Kandori wristcuff
<worn around wrist> a silver Kandori wristcuff
<wielded two-handed> a jagged edged warsword
<worn on legs> a set of riveted chainmail leggings
<worn on feet> a pair of lissome leather boots with metal capped toes
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You start paying increased attention to your surroundings.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Malkier Gate
This large iron gate leads to the fallen kingdom of Malkier, now covered
up by the Blight. A large stone road runs east to west and to the south
is the inner wall that surrounds the Keep. Hunting parties often use
this gate to journey into the Blight.
[ obvious exits: N E W ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
A weapon rack stands on the ground here, ready to store weapons.
You notice a pair of thick metal boots is hidden here.
You notice a pair of heavy metal gauntlets is hidden here.
You notice a titanic spiked axe of ebon steel is hidden here.
You notice a full metal helmet and visor is hidden here.
You notice a pair of ebony-steel plate greaves is hidden here.
You notice a pair of ebony-steel plate vambraces is hidden here.
You notice a bubbling draught is hidden here.
|1|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently, being ridden by you.
Petra of Illian is standing here.
Agatha of Illian is resting here, riding a |2|.gray palfrey.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop paying increased attention to your surroundings.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac calls for the Malkiergate to be opened.
The Shienaran gatekeeper unlocks the Malkiergate.
The Shienaran gatekeeper opens the Malkiergate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac has arrived from the north, riding a |3|.bloodstock stallion.
Gretchen has arrived from the north, riding a |4|.warhorse.
A wild stallion has arrived from the north.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac leaves west riding a bloodstock stallion.
Gretchen leaves west riding a warhorse.
A wild stallion leaves west.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac has arrived from the west, riding a |5|.bloodstock stallion.
Gretchen has arrived from the west, riding a |6|.warhorse.
A wild stallion has arrived from the west.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Gretchen is now a member of Vilac's group.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Gretchen stops following Vilac.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac leaves west riding a bloodstock stallion.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Gretchen grins evilly.
You narrate 'imma take some abs for chest'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren tells you 'yeah is no big deal'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop riding him.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > Road Inside the City Walls
[ obvious exits: E W U ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
|1|.Eyes keen, a Domani razor stands here swishing its tail.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > An Archer's Tower Above the Malkier Gate
[ obvious exits: D ]
Lady Lyren Talenos, Aes Sedai is standing here.
An archer draws his bow with a steady hand and a sharp eye.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren looks at you.
TICK IN 5 SECONDS.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'lemme knwo when you done it ake the pack of abs'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren tells you 'I just lost egown which is why I was wondering'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren gives you a tinful of a black, foul liquid.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'i'm done'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You reply to Lyren 'ah'
- >
You found a backpack.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are carrying:
a backpack
a tinful of a black, foul liquid
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'i didn't see any in that'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'what i do with tniful'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vivienne speaks from the Light 'Guys I need someone to pk my statter, who wants it?
'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'turn it in to merchant'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'for yellow'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vivienne speaks from the Light 'Not statter, tester.'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'whcihhhhhh'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are carrying:
a backpack
a tinful of a black, foul liquid
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > It is a backpack.
When you look inside, you see:
backpack (carried) :
a leather water flask
a pair of thick metal boots
a studded leather belt with a crossed swords buckle
a gargantuan gilded bastard sword
[2] a gator skin bracer
a pair of heavy metal gauntlets
a pair of steel-plated vambraces
[2] a torc of gleaming steel
a full metal helmet and visor
[2] a ring of silver
an oilstone
a pair of light, well-oiled leather boots
a divided riding skirt
a silver Kandori wristcuff
a stable ticket
a strange fruit
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'hrm'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'also'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Gretchen chats 'i can wheres it at?'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'hrm'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren starts worshipping nothing at all.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'we have sids grings from this?'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren nods solemnly.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You grab a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > TICK IN 5 SECONDS.
You say 'spare? that i can use?'
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You are carrying:
a tinful of a black, foul liquid
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You get a leather water flask from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You get an oilstone from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh >
Lyren says 'yeah, cause mine are here :p'
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh >
*Melayna* arrives from a flash of bright white light.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh >
Lyren gets a shimmering pendant of obsidian from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh >
Lyren gets a shimmering pendant of obsidian from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You get a divided riding skirt from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > The towertrap is open.
towertrap is now set as door3
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > I see no malkiergate here.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > I see no malkiergate here.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > Ok.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy >
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > *Melayna* tries to strike you, but you deflect the blow.
An archer joins your fight!
You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > *Melayna* falls down laughing.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > An archer barely tickles Melayna's body with his hit.
*Melayna* tries to strike you, but you deflect the blow.
You slice *Melayna*'s right arm hard.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > Lyren gets a sculpted statuette from a backpack.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > Lyren grabs a sculpted statuette.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > An archer tickles Melayna's body with his hit.
*Melayna* strikes your left hand very hard.
You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > *Melayna* opens the towertrap.
Ok.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched >
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > Lyren unleashes a flurry of icy spikes at *Melayna*, who is stabbed repeatedly.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > An archer tickles Melayna's body with his hit.
*Melayna* tries to strike you, but you deflect the blow.
You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > *Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
Lyren unleashes a flurry of icy spikes at *Melayna*, who is stabbed repeatedly.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Wounded > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Wounded > Lyren slashes *Melayna*'s body hard.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
An archer hits Melayna's right hand.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
You slice *Melayna*'s left foot.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > Lyren stops using a sculpted statuette.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered >
Lyren puts a sculpted statuette in a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > Lyren tries to slash *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
An archer barely hits Melayna's right leg.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
You barely slice *Melayna*'s right leg.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > Lyren assumes an offensive striking posture.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered >
Kerryk chats 'I'll stab it if you need that'
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > Lyren slashes *Melayna*'s body.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
An archer hits Melayna's left leg.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
You slice *Melayna*'s body.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
Vivienne speaks from the Light 'Thank you
'
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > An archer tickles Melayna's body with his hit.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
You slice *Melayna*'s body.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Beaten >
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
Lyren unleashes a flurry of icy spikes at *Melayna*, who is stabbed repeatedly.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > Gretchen chats 'np'
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > An archer hits Melayna's right hand.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
*Melayna* tries to strike you, but you deflect the blow.
You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical >
Lyren throws streaks of Fire at *Melayna*, whose freshly charred corpse crumples to the ground.
*Melayna* is dead! R.I.P.
Your blood freezes as you hear *Melayna*'s death cry.
[ obvious exits: N E W ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
A weapon rack stands on the ground here, ready to store weapons.
|1|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently, being ridden by you.
Petra of Illian is standing here.
Agatha of Illian is resting here, riding a |2|.gray palfrey.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Strong > You are carrying:
a backpack
a pair of ebony-steel plate greaves
* R HP:Wounded MV:Strong > It is a backpack.
When you look inside, you see:
backpack (carried) :
a leather water flask
a tinful of a black, foul liquid
a pair of thick metal boots
a studded leather belt with a crossed swords buckle
a gargantuan gilded bastard sword
[2] a gator skin bracer
a pair of heavy metal gauntlets
a pair of steel-plated vambraces
[2] a torc of gleaming steel
a full metal helmet and visor
[2] a ring of silver
an oilstone
a pair of light, well-oiled leather boots
a divided riding skirt
a silver Kandori wristcuff
a stable ticket
a strange fruit
* R HP:Wounded MV:Strong >
The Shienaran gatekeeper closes the Malkiergate.
The Shienaran gatekeeper locks the Malkiergate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac narrates 'zone w dusty'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > TICK IN 5 SECONDS.
Agatha stops resting, and clambers on her feet.
Ahakwah chats 'anyone know where I can get a studded leather jerkin?'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Agatha closes a weapon rack.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Agatha sits down and rests.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are already standing.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Road Inside the City Walls
[ obvious exits: E W ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
|1|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently, being ridden by you.
A run-down looking man wanders aimlessly, collecting lost belongings.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
A poor trash collector leaves east.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You tell Lyren 'skirt and oiled boots in this pack e u twoer trap'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Ok.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop riding him.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > An Archer's Tower Above the Malkier Gate
[ obvious exits: D ]
An archer draws his bow with a steady hand and a sharp eye.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You hide a backpack.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are carrying:
a pair of ebony-steel plate greaves
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren has arrived from below.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You hide a pair of ebony-steel plate greaves.
- >
You found a backpack.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You give a backpack to Lyren.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > Road Inside the City Walls
[ obvious exits: E W U ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
|1|.Eyes keen, a Domani razor stands here swishing its tail.
|2|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You start riding him.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop riding him.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You start riding him.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Malkier Gate
[ obvious exits: N E W ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
A weapon rack stands on the ground here, ready to store weapons.
|1|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently, being ridden by you.
Petra of Illian is standing here.
Agatha of Illian is resting here, riding a |2|.gray palfrey.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are carrying:
Nothing.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are using:
<used as light> a crystal lightstick
<worn on finger> a gold ring delicately carved with ivy
<worn on finger> a gold ring delicately carved with ivy
<worn on head> a strange, insectoid helm
<worn around neck> a blood-red tattoo of a flying eagle
<worn around neck> a blood-red tattoo of a flying eagle
<worn on body> a tunic of finely-crafted chain
<worn about body> an earthen brown mantle
<slung on back> an embroidered, cotton shoulder bag
<worn on arms> a pair of riveted chainmail sleeves
<worn on hands> a sturdy pair of full leather gauntlets
<worn around wrist> a silver Kandori wristcuff
<worn around wrist> a silver Kandori wristcuff
<wielded two-handed> a jagged edged warsword
<worn on legs> a set of riveted chainmail leggings
<worn on feet> a pair of lissome leather boots with metal capped toes
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop using a crystal lightstick.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You put a crystal lightstick in an embroidered, cotton shoulder bag.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac narrates 'firetruck it i need to go'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Vilac narrates 'going to the yankees game'
You tell Lyren 'will swap ya egown for surcoat if you want'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are using:
<worn on finger> a gold ring delicately carved with ivy
<worn on finger> a gold ring delicately carved with ivy
<worn on head> a strange, insectoid helm
<worn around neck> a blood-red tattoo of a flying eagle
<worn around neck> a blood-red tattoo of a flying eagle
<worn on body> a tunic of finely-crafted chain
<worn about body> an earthen brown mantle
<slung on back> an embroidered, cotton shoulder bag
<worn on arms> a pair of riveted chainmail sleeves
<worn on hands> a sturdy pair of full leather gauntlets
<worn around wrist> a silver Kandori wristcuff
<worn around wrist> a silver Kandori wristcuff
<wielded two-handed> a jagged edged warsword
<worn on legs> a set of riveted chainmail leggings
<worn on feet> a pair of lissome leather boots with metal capped toes
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You start paying increased attention to your surroundings.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Malkier Gate
This large iron gate leads to the fallen kingdom of Malkier, now covered
up by the Blight. A large stone road runs east to west and to the south
is the inner wall that surrounds the Keep. Hunting parties often use
this gate to journey into the Blight.
[ obvious exits: N E W ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
A weapon rack stands on the ground here, ready to store weapons.
You notice a pair of thick metal boots is hidden here.
You notice a pair of heavy metal gauntlets is hidden here.
You notice a titanic spiked axe of ebon steel is hidden here.
You notice a full metal helmet and visor is hidden here.
You notice a pair of ebony-steel plate greaves is hidden here.
You notice a pair of ebony-steel plate vambraces is hidden here.
You notice a bubbling draught is hidden here.
|1|.A warhorse is here, stamping his feet impatiently, being ridden by you.
Petra of Illian is standing here.
Agatha of Illian is resting here, riding a |2|.gray palfrey.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
A Shienaran guard keeps watch at the gate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop paying increased attention to your surroundings.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac calls for the Malkiergate to be opened.
The Shienaran gatekeeper unlocks the Malkiergate.
The Shienaran gatekeeper opens the Malkiergate.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac has arrived from the north, riding a |3|.bloodstock stallion.
Gretchen has arrived from the north, riding a |4|.warhorse.
A wild stallion has arrived from the north.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac leaves west riding a bloodstock stallion.
Gretchen leaves west riding a warhorse.
A wild stallion leaves west.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac has arrived from the west, riding a |5|.bloodstock stallion.
Gretchen has arrived from the west, riding a |6|.warhorse.
A wild stallion has arrived from the west.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Gretchen is now a member of Vilac's group.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Gretchen stops following Vilac.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vilac leaves west riding a bloodstock stallion.
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > Gretchen grins evilly.
You narrate 'imma take some abs for chest'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren tells you 'yeah is no big deal'
* R HP:Wounded MV:Full > You stop riding him.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > Road Inside the City Walls
[ obvious exits: E W U ]
An oil lamp, set in a steel cage, hangs from a high wooden pole.
|1|.Eyes keen, a Domani razor stands here swishing its tail.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > An Archer's Tower Above the Malkier Gate
[ obvious exits: D ]
Lady Lyren Talenos, Aes Sedai is standing here.
An archer draws his bow with a steady hand and a sharp eye.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren looks at you.
TICK IN 5 SECONDS.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'lemme knwo when you done it ake the pack of abs'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren tells you 'I just lost egown which is why I was wondering'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren gives you a tinful of a black, foul liquid.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'i'm done'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You reply to Lyren 'ah'
- >
You found a backpack.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are carrying:
a backpack
a tinful of a black, foul liquid
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'i didn't see any in that'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'what i do with tniful'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vivienne speaks from the Light 'Guys I need someone to pk my statter, who wants it?

* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'turn it in to merchant'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'for yellow'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Vivienne speaks from the Light 'Not statter, tester.'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'whcihhhhhh'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You are carrying:
a backpack
a tinful of a black, foul liquid
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > It is a backpack.
When you look inside, you see:
backpack (carried) :
a leather water flask
a pair of thick metal boots
a studded leather belt with a crossed swords buckle
a gargantuan gilded bastard sword
[2] a gator skin bracer
a pair of heavy metal gauntlets
a pair of steel-plated vambraces
[2] a torc of gleaming steel
a full metal helmet and visor
[2] a ring of silver
an oilstone
a pair of light, well-oiled leather boots
a divided riding skirt
a silver Kandori wristcuff
a stable ticket
a strange fruit
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren says 'hrm'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'also'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Gretchen chats 'i can wheres it at?'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'hrm'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren starts worshipping nothing at all.
* HP:Wounded MV:Full > You say 'we have sids grings from this?'
* HP:Wounded MV:Full >
Lyren nods solemnly.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You grab a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > TICK IN 5 SECONDS.
You say 'spare? that i can use?'
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You are carrying:
a tinful of a black, foul liquid
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You get a leather water flask from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You get an oilstone from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh >
Lyren says 'yeah, cause mine are here :p'
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh >
*Melayna* arrives from a flash of bright white light.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh >
Lyren gets a shimmering pendant of obsidian from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh >
Lyren gets a shimmering pendant of obsidian from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You get a divided riding skirt from a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh > You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > The towertrap is open.
towertrap is now set as door3
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > I see no malkiergate here.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > I see no malkiergate here.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > Ok.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy >
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > *Melayna* tries to strike you, but you deflect the blow.
An archer joins your fight!
You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > *Melayna* falls down laughing.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Healthy > An archer barely tickles Melayna's body with his hit.
*Melayna* tries to strike you, but you deflect the blow.
You slice *Melayna*'s right arm hard.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > Lyren gets a sculpted statuette from a backpack.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > Lyren grabs a sculpted statuette.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > An archer tickles Melayna's body with his hit.
*Melayna* strikes your left hand very hard.
You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > *Melayna* opens the towertrap.
Ok.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched >
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > Lyren unleashes a flurry of icy spikes at *Melayna*, who is stabbed repeatedly.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > An archer tickles Melayna's body with his hit.
*Melayna* tries to strike you, but you deflect the blow.
You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Hurt > *Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
Lyren unleashes a flurry of icy spikes at *Melayna*, who is stabbed repeatedly.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Wounded > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Wounded > Lyren slashes *Melayna*'s body hard.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
An archer hits Melayna's right hand.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
You slice *Melayna*'s left foot.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > Lyren stops using a sculpted statuette.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered >
Lyren puts a sculpted statuette in a backpack.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > Lyren tries to slash *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
An archer barely hits Melayna's right leg.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
You barely slice *Melayna*'s right leg.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > Lyren assumes an offensive striking posture.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered >
Kerryk chats 'I'll stab it if you need that'
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > Lyren slashes *Melayna*'s body.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
An archer hits Melayna's left leg.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
You slice *Melayna*'s body.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
Vivienne speaks from the Light 'Thank you

It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Battered > An archer tickles Melayna's body with his hit.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
You slice *Melayna*'s body.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Beaten >
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
Lyren unleashes a flurry of icy spikes at *Melayna*, who is stabbed repeatedly.
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > Gretchen chats 'np'
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > An archer hits Melayna's right hand.
*Melayna* panics, and attempts to flee!
*Melayna* tries to strike you, but you deflect the blow.
You try to slice *Melayna*, but she deflects the blow.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical > It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Critical >
Lyren throws streaks of Fire at *Melayna*, whose freshly charred corpse crumples to the ground.
*Melayna* is dead! R.I.P.
Your blood freezes as you hear *Melayna*'s death cry.
Re: funniest thing you've ever seen here
DOES ANYONE HAVE PICK?!?
Re: funniest thing you've ever seen here
Tzao was a national treasure.
Re: funniest thing you've ever seen here
Lol.. you know this is about to sting hahaha* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > Lyren gets a sculpted statuette from a backpack.
It's already closed!
* HP:Hurt MV:Fresh - Melayna: Scratched > Lyren grabs a sculpted statuette.
that's great. Please! keep them coming guys it cracks me up.
Re: funniest thing you've ever seen here
Axo and Argent bonded, Argent accidentally fireballed Axo at orch entrance during pk, ultimately causing them both to die and Axo to lose a heron. Haven't seen either of them since now that I think about it...
Re: funniest thing you've ever seen here
GROLM! GROLM!!! GROLM!!!!!! Do I ever wish I had a log of that. If anyone remember the famous Grolm incident on DS and somehow captured it, could you please post it! It's hands down the funniest thing I have seen in my 20+ years of playing. I cannot remember who was narrating GROLM!, but Whorgomasadar and I just about died laughing once we figured out what was going on. I don't wanna ruin the story just in case someone has the log 
