Post
by faul » Tue May 02, 2017 4:39 pm
Some of these tips are applicable to life in general, as well. You're welcome.
1. Try to hold people you have no control over to standards you couldn't possibly hold them to and then get upset when they don't conform to your desires. Remember, they're just text.
2. Act like a a small cat called Nigel, but only when you think the people you're trying to become friends with are not around or don't know who you are. You don't want those people to think badly of you, but anyone else? firetruck 'em.
3. Display erratic behavior when you think your audiences are different. It's a big, anonymous world and nobody will ever really know things you don't want them to know.
4. Consider yourself special and deserving, just in general.
5. If you can't get your way, be sure to publicly whine about it. You don't really want to miss an opportunity for righteous indignation.
6. Recognize that every group is homogeneous and there's just no way that you can win over enough people that any potential dissenters would get overruled. Once you've established 6, don't forget to make really broad generalizations; you obviously have no chance at coming off like a very fine person, gender being but a construct of society and annoying people you weren't previously annoying.
7. Be sure to run from PK all the time, don't want to risk dying and looking like a jerk.
8. Be sure to constantly die in PK, to the point where nobody's really sure if you're just bad or don't care; don't want to live through PK and look like a well-proportioned felid.
9. Remember, people are always completely reasonable, unbiased, one-track minded, and around to cater to your specific needs. Even if you suck and aren't particularly easygoing or likable, they really can't deny your Jaiken-like silence, stab-trigger, nature-boy descriptions, unwillingness to follow in PK sometimes, and hoards of phat lewts when considering you. I mean, those are just facts.
10. Just assume that nobody has had a similar experience to yours and hasn't worked through it. That's just how things work.