ACT THE FIRST
'Twas the night before Bel Tine and in Caemlyn Square
A wicked wind blew through and ruffled my hair.
I sprung to my feet to see what was alight
and next thing I knew I had such a fright.
For something struck me, and blew me, and when I awoke
My legs were wedged into a wagon wheel spoke.
And my arms were covered in dry stable grass,
and my head was wedged firmly up a horse's.....
...pannier.
I ran back to the square but by then he was gone.
I yelled, "You get away this time Dougan, but not for long!
For every time you terrorize a people born free
you must face the wrath of the almighty Glee!"
ACT THE SECOND
'Twas the day before Sunday, and in Tar Valon,
I plucked on my lute and considered a song.
Then what did my wondrous ears pick up further?
Was an alarm of the Tower Guards screaming murder!
I saddled my pony, and rode him north hard,
and found Dougan in Cyril's fighting a guard.
He stretched out his hand and rendered the man blind,
And I leaped in with knives out to flay him and rind.
That guard buffed like a champ! Lo, we got Dougan beat,
When suddenly, with a gesture and pivot of his feet,
And in a flash of light, once again he was gone!
Curse you Dougan! Also, you're welcome, Tar Valon!
ACT THE THIRD
'Twas a fine day in Four Kings, and Gode was about,
Howling after Strom and Hake and his other louts.
We rode through the town, but before we could react a smidge,
He appeared! and promptly threw Murdo under a bridge.
As my gleefriend drowned, I leaped at him with my knife,
When suddenly I was blind, and fleeing for my life.
And poison coursed swiftly throughout my veins,
And my horse had bucked and cast off of his reins.
So retreated I did, to a stable with pails,
Then a kind Wisdom cured me of all of my ails.
He appeared again, and threw us like wind on the grass,
And once more I found myself dusting off my....
...pannier.
But I vowed to stand firm, no matter what evil abode,
and I yelled out to Dougan "This is the end of your road!"
I slipped to the shadows and quietly I crept.
Till I saw him in the stable, and quickly I lept.
It was too late for him to stop my attack,
And quickly my dagger sunk into his back.
He waved a hand, and flames burst into my face,
And I fell chills run down to my most private place.
{shiver}
So I fled, and I crept, and I lunged once again,
And I struck the evil fiend right under his shin.
And though I was bleeding and the stable was filling with gore,
I fled, and crept, and struck him once more!
And as he lay bleeding, spurting and gasping for air
I knew the tale of Dougan Revarnan would end there.
So I whispered to him all that I had left to be said,
and these were the words he heard as I severed his head.
"I told you once, if you mess with the Glee,
you son of a bitch, at the end of a knife you'll find me!"